Thursday at noon used to consist of catching the train to work. I'd be wearing all black (an appropriately mournful color) and applying makeup on public trans. Yes. I'm that woman.
But today I'm sitting at my kitchen table typing my break away while Zaiah sleeps for an indefinite amount of time. I'm housebound and the sun has come out, also for an indefinite amount of time.
All I see in my future are question marks. What will I do this afternoon with an active and whiny toddler in the cold rain? What will I do tomorrow? Next week? Next year? God only knows!
The other day I read through a couple old blog posts and realized -- Wow! I used to have a life. Now I work hard so that other people's lives can flourish. A number of other people actually! I realize I sound like I'm complaining (because I am) but think about it. What if you were suddenly economically dependent, mentally under-challenged and physically exhausted by the never ending activities of childcare without the break of paid work, even to a job you hate?
Break over. He's awake!
So, let the hardest and least paying job begin.
Full time parenting!
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